Illinois Foster Dog Has Zero Manners And A Quirky Habit, But His Brutally Honest Adoption Post Proves He Is Worth It
When it came time to write an Illinois adoption post for Chowder, his foster parent decided to skip the sugar-coating and embrace his gross, quirky, and completely lovable personality.
An Unconventional Approach
Writing an adoption profile for an Illinois rescue dog usually involves highlighting their absolute best, most angelic qualities.
But for one special foster dog named Chowder, sugar-coating the truth simply wasn’t an option. Chowder is not your average, polite house pet.
According to his foster parent, he is honestly pretty gross and quirky. Yet, it is exactly those bizarre traits that make him so incredibly endearing.
To find him the perfect forever home, his foster knew they had to write a post as hilarious and honest as Chowder himself.
Sturdy Children Required
The very first requirement on Chowder’s adoption list is a unique one: “Sturdy, non-breakable children.”
This isn’t because Chowder is mean, but rather because he possesses what his foster describes as “Hulk-like” strength.
When he gets moving, he really gets moving. His foster paints a vivid picture of what walking him can entail if you aren’t prepared.
They warn potential adopters to be ready for a “fall down on the ground and get dragged a block while the concrete is scraping your knees kind of Hulk strength.”
Screaming Like A Banshee
The second requirement on Chowder’s list is a strict “No” to other dogs in the home.
Chowder has a very specific and highly vocal reaction whenever he spots another canine out in the world.
Instead of a typical bark or a low growl, Chowder prefers to make a scene.
“When he sees other dogs, he screams like a banshee,” his foster explains.
A Hyena With Gorilla Strength
Taking Chowder for a walk requires a healthy dose of humility and a strong center of gravity.
His foster jokes that whoever adopts him will have to “hang your head in shame as people stare at your lunatic dog and give you the stink eye.”
However, they advise not hanging your head too low, because you still need to maintain your balance to hold onto his leash.
“You’re not walking a regular old dog,” they noted. “You’re walking a hyena with gorilla strength.”
Fenced Yards And Local Love
Because of his unique quirks and impressive strength, Chowder needs a specific type of living environment.
His ideal home is a single-family house complete with a securely fenced yard where he can safely burn off his energy.
Furthermore, his foster parent has placed a strict geographic limit on his adoption applications: Illinois residents only.
They have grown so attached to him that they refuse to accept out-of-state applicants, insisting, “I need my gross foster to be living in driving distance of me.”
A Very Loud Sleeper
Just when potential adopters might think they have a handle on all of Chowder’s quirks, there is one more detail to consider.
Even when he is finally resting, Chowder manages to make his presence known throughout the house.
His foster parent almost forgot to add a crucial detail to his profile: he snores.
And, true to Chowder’s larger-than-life personality, “It’s not quiet.”
The Path To Better Manners
Despite his lack of etiquette, there is plenty of hope for Chowder’s future behavior.
He is highly treat-motivated, which makes him an excellent candidate for continued learning.
His foster parent notes that with some positive training and consistency, he will be well on his way to developing some actual manners.
He just needs a family willing to put in the time and the treats to help him reach his full potential.
Embracing The Gross
Even with a face and personality as chaotic as Chowder’s, his foster family remains optimistic.
They firmly believe that he will find his perfect forever home, even if he is currently lacking in the manners department.
While training will help his behavior, his foster parent playfully reminds everyone that his core personality isn’t going anywhere.
“He’ll still be gross, though. You can’t fix that. Embrace the gross.”
